Sunday, February 14, 2016
Do Christian Wives "Owe" Their Husbands Sex?
I’m not usually one to get up in arms when another Christian thinks something I don’t, and normally I really think this lady is right on (and I do think her intentions are good) but this post just made me a little sick to read, and more so the comments section. I remember also once reading a very fundamental Christian guy flat-out saying on his site that it is indeed a sin to not have sex with your husband.
Because this is a pretty serious topic, I'm going to be blunt here. I don’t care if this offends someone: women and men, you do not “owe” your spouse sex. It is not a “sin” to not want to “pump them dry” as that lady’s husband encourages us to do. It’s not God’s will for you to be a sex slave of any kind. Marriage is about sacrifice and God first, enjoyment second. It isn’t godly to guilt people into sex, telling them they’re being a bad spouse if they don’t feel like hopping into bed every five minutes with you. That's flat-out emotional manipulation.
And what utter nonsense to pretend women have NO temptations! Are you kidding? Like we have never ogled shirtless men? We have temptations with sin, too. Christians, stop treating men as helpless babies who have no self-control and blaming women for them not giving their husbands “enough”. I say this to wives as well but frankly, as much as I hate to admit it, with a lot of Christians it’s usually women they see as responsible for this. And husbands, you, too, are not obliged to feel guilted into doing something you are not up for.
I am not married yet (though I hope one day to be), so I know some might say I have no experience to back this up. Do I really need it to point out sin? I don't think so. It is just selfishness and rigid legalism behind this attitude and I do not believe for a minute one should be married, divorced or single to have the authority to acknowledge this sinful attitude.